Trading the word in for a question

It's that time of year again; actually depending on your calendar I could be considered late.

I've been puzzling over the guiding "word" for this next year. The truth of the Word, is in it's function as a tool. Compass, measuring stick, hammer.

I finally realised this year, I want a question:

"Who would I be, if I weren't who I am?"

I'm not talking about delving as deep as Byron Katie. But We've all been guilty of this in one form or another. "That's not my style; I wouldn't do That; Where would I wear it?; I don't deserve; I always; I'm not that type of person." Or heard it from another "You'll never...; She'd never...; Mom wouldn't..."

What if I weren't that woman? After all, I'm not who I was at 10, 20, 30, or 40. All those phases seem as though they involved specific persona, this time I think I'll take charge of shaping that persona a little more.

The next year is going to be rough for TAO and I anyway. There will be some shakeups, changes, challenges...more than the standard-dealing-with-life-stuff. Things we've been working toward for 10 years are getting ready to happen in the next coupla; so while we're dealing with all of that, what's a little seasoning shook in?

Perhaps the candy sprinkles that will carry us through. (that and our vacation in 107 days of course.)

Picking myself up off the floor

It didn't take 4-6 weeks after all. I PASSED!

Looking at the score breakdown; I missed the 5 questions I thought I would, and for the practical...remember the story of ABD? Well, because of the following the statutes, not the testing (doing ABD) I totally skunked the points for that part of the protocol, but did everything else for a perfect score - making the total high enough to pass.

End of saga. ;)

Happy Thoughts

Since discussion of the test is verboten, how about some goodness?
But first: thank you veterans and all who are currently serving.



I cast on the hot viral knit Damson in Dream in Color Smooshy in ButterPeeps, and now I don't want to work on anything else. I love the yarn, I love the texture, I love the color, and I even love the "boring" garter stitch part of this project.

I made myself a little hot water bottle cover out of some ultra plush super soft knit fabric from JoAnns. As well as a little knee pillow cover of the same fabric.

A round of applause for my supermodel.
Then I finished Ergonomic Earwarmer by Feistywoman Designs

I don't want to talk about it.

The test, that is.

I either passed it splendidly, or failed it splendidly. Usually I leave a test with a sense of whether or not I passed. For instance, I have no qualms about the written exam. I can think of 5 questions I may have gotten wrong, and I can miss 35 to pass.

It's the practical that has my adrenals doing the dance. On the bright side...the person I needed showed up. (Yay!) On the dark side...not appropriate at all; but meeting the letter of the regulations so off we set.

My uncertainty about the practical springs from a difference in statutes. WI statutes state-in specific, clear language- thou shall do such and such. The chemical MSDS seconds that. The testing guidelines state something different. I went with the state guidelines because when I called the third party testing people for clarification before the exam, they said we "don't know, we just do what the state says. Call the state." Called the state and she said "don't know, lots of people do it wrong, but the code says ABD, so do ABD."

Well, ABD, threw the test administrators into a tizzy, if I flunk for that reason, I can file an appeal. But that initial action caused the proctors to watch me like ornithologists with a new species. Even my test buddy said something on the drive home about "those biddies really had it in for you, they didn't watch anyone else at all."

Now, apparently, it's 4 to 6 weeks to find out what comes next. In the meantime, let's talk about something else shall we?

Calling on the Good in the Universe

Next Monday I sit for a very important State Board.

Well, the Universe will not collapse into a black hole sucking all life in with it if I fail.

However, it's been a heck of a journey to this moment in time. It has involved literally Years of testing and effort. It has involved thousands of dollars. It has involved dealing with bureaucracy until you want to rip out your own ear drums. All for something that Should Have Been Simple. Now, due to the lottery system of the testing date, it's down to the last wire and deuced inconvenient. People I have relied on have betrayed/abandoned me along the way, yet others have stepped forward to take their place. But I'm leery. Certain things MUST happen - other people are involved, they MUST do their part or I'm scr-wed. Not a happy feeling.

Add to this brew the fact that while I am an excellent test taker, I am an abysmal test waiter, filled with forebodings and nightmares of failure - spectacular, public failure. (Poor TAO.) Additionally, I have call 9 days in a row before the test, and have to drive 1600 miles to get back to the house the day before I have to be 3 hours from home on a cold WI morning for the first part of the test at 730am (with said person in tow). insert hysterical sobbing here

So, while there are others who have illness, plague, poverty, misfortune, unemployment, etc. I am asking for y'alls novenas, candles, incense, tossed coin, or other charm of choice for me next Monday. (and perhaps a little thought that I don't have a stroke this week, trying to juggle everything)

Boxing the Compass

A finished object! These are Wendy D. Johnson's Peace Socks worked in a worsted weight yarn but at a sock gauge. They were part of the Socks from the Toe Up KAL, and included some pattern modifications purely as a matter of taste. Highly recommend as a fast, easy knit if you are determined to make socks as a last minute gift.




This little jewel is the southern point of my compass. Alisha's Plush sock in colorway Rainier. Handdyed here in Southern Texas. As I travel around for work I pick up souvenir yarn. As far north as Alaska, west to Oregon coast, east to DC or Baltimore, previously south was held by Northern Florida, but has been surplanted by Southern Texas. I do think it's ironic that my southern souvenir is named after a Mountain I grew up near. And the plush in Plush Sock? A little bit of cashmere. Mmmn.


Before going to see the Alamo (priorities!) I went to the Yarn Barn of San Antonio, a combination knit/crochet/needlepoint store. The selection was nice including a wide variety of indie dyers and good pricepoint coverage. But the clerks were what really made this store shine! Genuine greeting, help, and conversation. Very pleasant. They even took a picture of the FLS so I could show y'all a better image... check out the wall of yarn I'm standing in front of.

My kingdom for a photographer!

Well, I finally finished something - my February Lady Sweater!
(so not linking to that pattern, because y'all are serious knitters and know to what I refer) 6993 projects on Ravelry with 3846 posted as finished.

I wish I had a human to photograph me in it though, the only pictures I could take were...well...you'll see : )




I used 14 balls of Valley Yarns Sugarloaf, an easy to care for yarn, which is good because I forsee a lot of wear in this sweaters future. The yarn is splitty which led to some "rackum frackum s" when attempting to manipulate for lace. But it's nice smooshiness makes up for it. Basically no modifications except for fit/sizing. I started with the smallest neck for more clavicle coverage, increased to the medium to the sleeve split, then decreased out the seven underarm stitches within 8 rows to keep the body from A-lining & adding visual width.

I'm currently in 90+ weather with 75+ humidity, so this yummy Lady will have to wait for a change in location. Perhaps I'll crank the AC for just tonight though, so I can bask in her snuggliness.

May you be inscribed.

For You are He Who remembers forever all forgotten things -- Rosh Hashanah Musaf Amidah.

Another year has alternately whisked/dragged by.

In an odd twist, I am home and TAO is not. Which I can tell you, feels very odd. When I think of this house, I picture TAO in it somewhere. And the dogs are confused, they're used to not knowing when I'm coming through the door, but Dad comes home by dark - hence their confusion.

Too often this year I have forgotten that "Life is Good", I've been so busy keeping our head above the water that I've lost sight of being grateful I can paddle. There were some episodes in which I was, frankly, betrayed. And that made me unwilling to perform the small graces which make life civilized. However, as the Amidah says today "remembers...all forgotten things". Hopefully, the small goods that I have unconsiously done will cancel the sins that I can not name.

May your own next year be filled with grace, strength, and sweetness.

The Project that almost didn't live

Behold the Alpha tank. So named because of the yarn, Online Alpha. There are alot of reasons this item almost never came about. I bought the yarn while doped up from surgery - this is obvious - how can you tell? It's Pink. Seriously, pink. Frick.

Overlooking the pinkness (something that I have none of in my wardrobe because I loathe it), it is a lovely set of hues - in a cotton. Had I learned to knit on cotton I would now be a devout matchstick constructor, rug hooker, tiddlywink champ, anything but a knitter. I remembered why I don't own much cotton yarn shortly after I cast on with it in July. It splits, which since it's a ten ply, means it splits alot; doesn't matter how dull the needle/how sharp the needle/what size the crochet hook.

Also on the negative side (for the yarn) it's expensive, but poorly dyed. It is apparently spray dyed, because the center of the yarn is white, making it easy to find every split stitch. Fortunately it was on sale. Perhaps that helps explain why pink yarn seemed like a good idea

Then there was the pattern. I started with Wendy Bernards angelic chorus essential tank, but the pinks pooled. Dear Readers of this blog know how I feel about pooling. Pools are for aerobics, not for on my body. So I converted it to in the round...no pooling. Finished the entire project -even wove in ends.

Tried it on - the pattern is written for the willowy and flat chested. On a more Reubenesqe woman - practically soft core porn - at the very least "mutton dressed as lamb". No problem, I still have yarn. I'll just add some sleeves, and bring up the neckline.

Great, now it's slutty meets dirndl. Rip Rip Rip. Frick Frick Frick. TAO is in the recliner, carefully not looking or commenting.

Back to the books...Yarn Girls to the rescue. Beyond the Basics - Tank You Very Much; demure, still a summer top, right gauge. Small modifications including garter stitch at the bottom, waistline shaping, and superhero boob mask.

Now I need to log off and go wear this before it snows.

This little piggie.

That would be me. I am packing to hit the road again, and trying to be mature about packing the knitting. All I can say is "oink oink". Never mind a realistic look at how many hours a week I work, have call, workout, study for the boards, need to sleep, etc etc. I want to take alllllll my books and alllllll my stash; because well, what if I pack only these things and then get bored with them? Or they don't work out? Or I finish everything? Or, Or,

Pardon me while I return to snorfling my yarn.

Taking it all

The credit and the blame, that is.

Blame: Through actions completely my own I find that the next 4 weeks are going to be frenetic. It's time to pack and move again, followed by jury duty, State Boards, and the High Holidays.

Blame: I have, again, miscalculated the food situation, and overbooked my Tasks list. My genetics apparently include some deep set hoarding instinct. At the end of every assignment I vow to change my grocery habits, and -here we are again.

TAO and I decided to wait until we were ready for condo living to move, so that's off for now. We did have the realtor look at our house and we're going to work our way down the list, so that when the time comes, the house is ready. Guess I should stop stashing for my retirement and knit it now, the retirement place will be too small. It did feel good to hash out the goals and agree on a mutual direction. The past year has been stressful for us both, to the point where we both were eyeing the liquor cabinet thoughtfully. I have valid concerns that TAOs job is going to give him a stroke, and while I'd like to whisk him away from it Today, which could be done, that choice would delay other goals. Only 194 days to vacation.

Taking good wife credit: We had TAOs birthday bash last weekend, complete with deep fried turkies, preseason football, and fireworks. (Perfect man party). I asked several times what he wanted for his birthday "Nothing". Okay honey, consider the expense of the party your gift. "Okay". He calls this week, "you got a new holder for your ipod in the mail." "No, that's for your ipod." 20 minutes later - "send it back, it doesn't fit." "Hmmn, guess it must be for your new Birthday Ipod that is coming ON your birthday" "Gee, really, for me?!?" Nothing, my arse, give me a break buddy. I did notice when you said your battery wouldn't hold a charge anymore. Last year I got him the Nike+ workout system, and he built an Avatar on the site that is so cute, I sometimes log in just to see what it's up to. But his ipod is on it's death throes.

Taking good girl credit: I've lost 6 lbs and kept it off for 2 weeks. I don't count a weight until it's been held 2 weeks. I'm especially proud of that because I painted myself into a corner stresswise and could easily have gone the other direction weightwise. Bought new workout pants as a reward.

Knitting credit: I reknit both balls of the ripped sleeve for the FLS. Much happier with it.

I have also been fiddling with this over the last few months: I dyed the yarn for these socks in 07, knit up a pair for TAO, mailed home. Realised this year that he doesn't wear them due to fit issues. Ripped out socks, reknit, could not get 2 that matched/fit for the life of me. Reknit the PAIR 5 times now. Yes, Five. Yes, Pair. Almost done with the pair this time, and if they don't fit, expect the rotary cutter to figure prominently in the next post about them. It would help if the model were closer.

Gotta go study/pack/clean. Don't forget to balance your blame with taking credit this week.